… why.

Minutes ago my mom stumbled into our flat suuuuper drunk and couldn’t walk straight. i tried to help her into her bed, but then she peed on the floor from laughing so hard. and i had to clean it up - while she was still laughing.

cheeeesus mom.

you owe me.

so a few weeks ago I was feeling rly horny and decided to film a video of me masturbating to send to my long distance boyfriend 

everyone else in the house had already gone to bed and I’m completely silent when I wank so I figured I was safe, I stripped down so I was wearing just my knickers and started wanking whilst sat at my desk

things were going well and I was getting pretty close but then suddenly my door opened - my mum was coming to give me a comb before she went to sleep - and because my desk is right in front of my bedroom door I had to awkwardly tell her “I’m not decent give me a minute” to get her to close my door and wait for me to put my pyjamas back on before I could take the damn comb off her

and because the walls in our house are kinda thin I heard her say “well that was awkward” to my stepdad after she left, and the next morning I told her explicitly to knock before coming into my room after everyone else is asleep b/c I like to blog naked or some other bullshit excuse I managed to come up with